Last night I had a nightmare, woke up to pee, looked at my phone and then couldn’t fall back asleep for two hours. It was lame.

You know what I had a nightmare about? I had a dream that I had a photo session that I had to take Bennett to. Why is that so horrible? My child doesn’t sit still and if there is something to discover, climb, pull apart etc… he will find it. My entire dream was spent chasing Bennett around while ignoring my clients and failing at my job.

There is nothing profound about this post. This is just what I have been thinking about lately. The mommy brain thing is real. So painfully real. I find myself struggling with communicating with people lately when I also have to watch Bennett.

For example, we sold a couch and chair on the WF B/S/T site yesterday. We moved the set into the playroom so that the new owners could easily inspect them (and so I wouldn’t have to clean our dog hair covered sunroom). As she is telling me she loves them, Bennett climbs up on it, walks to the edge, I see him about to jump off, I lunge and grab his arm, he twists mid air, his feet leave the couch and here I am dangling my kid who just face planted and barely missed a serious fall. I heard the first couple words out of her mouth and then I have no idea what she was saying… all I was thinking was don’t let your kid get seriously hurt.

I find myself doing this so often. Not just the oh my goodness, you’re going to get hurt, but Bennett will just disappear when we are out and about. He’s not one to sit in a shopping cart, he wants to be up and moving and walking…. which turns a simple trip to Target into a circus with disappearing acts. Terrifying.

Even play dates can be challenging. I try so hard to be actively listening but I find myself trying to make sure Bennett isn’t finding an open door that leads outside, electrical sockets, etc.

I know what you’re going to say. Just relax. Or just wait until you have more kids. Yea Yea Yea. I hear you… but the things I am concerned about are the “you’ll seriously get hurt” things. Like, don’t scale the oven. Don’t try and run away from me in the gym parking lot. The things that if they happened, would be life changing.  Maybe more kids would relax me…. but right now I feel like my brain is mush.

Anyone else have a serious dare devil child who keeps them on their toes?