We are in such a fun (and tiring) stage in the Relbot household. B has learned and can efficiently pull up on anything and everything. He’s standing and learning to balance by himself and he’s oh so daring. I have two very strong emotions while watching him in this stage. My first is, “I’m so stinking proud of you!!!!!” My Second, “Oh my goodness, this is terrifying”. It’s not the act of him pulling up and standing that terrifies me. It’s the part where he falls down and gets hurt that makes me grit my teeth and use my super mom powers to NOT wrap him in bubble wrap.

Bennett has no fear of getting hurt. He is very cautious around people and new surroundings, but when he’s at home and around us, he is like a stuntman. From trying  to climb off his dress, up his dresser, up his crib, under tables, on bookshelves, out of his high chair, out of the bathtub. He’ll try to climb up you, over you, under you and sometimes through you. He’s strong and determined and when he wants something, he will do everything in his power to get it. What great qualities to have, right?!

Bennett knows no fear because he has experienced very little pain. He’s just now starting to fall and get hurt. As an adult though, I have experienced terrible pain. Emotional, physical, mental. We know that there will be physical pain if we climb up something and let go. We know that we will fall to the ground and most likely get hurt. So we live in fear and avoid things. Bennett doesn’t know that yet and it fascinates me. He has to learn for himself. I have to trust God with his life so that HE can be Bennett’s refuge through any trials and tribulations that come his way. I have to trust God enough to let Bennett venture out of the safe little bubble that I have created for him so far. I have to have faith that Bennett will be ok, even though I know he will fall down while he’s exploring this beautiful messy world.

I struggle with fear. Fear of failing. Fear of rejection. Fear of the unknown. Fear of pain. Fear of Bennett getting hurt. Fear of _____________.

What does the bible say about fear though?

Isaiah 41.10

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

Psalm 27:1

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation– whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life– of whom shall I be afraid?

Psalm 118:6

6 The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?

2 Timothy 1:7

7 For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Psalm 56:3

3 When I am afraid, I will trust in You.

Why do I fear though? Because I struggle with having faith. I’m not bashing myself, it’s the truth.

Fear flourishes when my faith is shaken. When my faith is small. When I’m not focused on His promises.

Bennett’s faith is grand. It’s unshaken. It’s abundant…. because he hasn’t experienced failure yet. He knows nothing EXCEPT faith. He isn’t going… well…. what happens if I try to pull up on this and I fall. He’s thinking, I want to stand up, so let’s do this. Let’s pull up and stand. There is not thought of, what bad thing could happen if it doesn’t work out.  I want his faith. I’m working towards his faith. He lives a life that isn’t restricted, bounded and squashed by fear.

I believe that’s one of the things that the bible is referring to when it says,

Matthew 18:2-4

² He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. ³ And he said:“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. ⁴ Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

God doesn’t call us to fear the what if’s. He doesn’t call us to fear at all.

He calls us to have a life of faith. Of daring leaps. Of trust. Of determination to be faithful in our loving. A life that glorifies Him and what He’s all about.

I want to be like Bennett. I want to have his faith. He doesn’t fear failure. It’s challenging to even imagine a life of not fearing failure. What would my life look like if I didn’t fear pain? Didn’t fear rejection? Didn’t fear _____________?

I want to be daring like Bennett. I want to boldly move towards what God is calling me to do without the, “What if this doesn’t work out”.

I want to have faith like Bennett. I want to have faith that God has him. That God is in control. That God will take care of him. That God will use me to guide him. That God is all the things He says He is.

This journey of mamahood is so rich with learning, trials and love. I am changed from who Bennett is and he doesn’t even know it.

Today, I pray that we replace our fear with Bennett like faith.

What do you need to replace in your life? Today I choose faith over fear.